Get Your Bouch-On

Well, it's been quite a while since my last post. I'm not quite sure how to explain my absence, but I'd like to think that I was "soul-searching." I would insert some haikus and avant-garde sonnets here, but I think I'll leave that to others for their artistry.

So in keeping with traditions, fellow hoodlums D and J, with guest chef Guju-guru P, and I decided to recreate the tomfoolery that was the dinner party last year. This year presented some new challenges, though. We had an extra guest: the ruthless biker Melissa, who was charged a hefty ticket in Davis.

After brainstorming, we decided on a seafood-based bonanza. However, we were conflicted over the theme. Island flair? Texture contrast? Eclectic nonsense? Yes, that one.

Prepping:

Brazilian cashews - finely chopped by the dexterous J


Shittake mushrooms of the Ling Ling Province (on a violin cutting board, of all shapes)


Fibonacci's Nonorzo with fresh shrooms, basil, and FDA-approved spinach

So first, we had a vision for wild mushroom risotto. Risotto took too much time to prep, so we went to buy orzo, but ended up with some nonorzo, as pictured above. After cooking that in a seemingly 1:1 ratio of vegetable broth and chardonnay (you're welcome), we infused the goods with some fresh basil and spinach. That sit in the pot while we sauteed portabellos and shittakes and mixed that in. What resulted was a dish that would make Fibonacci himself proud and a bit tipsy indeed.


Garlic roasted asparagi

Just follow these steps:
1: Cut up some garlic
2: Place the garlic, salt, olive oil asapragi
3: Pop the asparagi in the oven

Ok, not quite the genius of Dick in a Box, but simple nonetheless.


Crab cakes from the delightful town of Baltimore (pictured below)


Baltimore, in all its glory

Now, a Christmas party ain't a party without some crabcakes. It was more like I had a severe craving for them, so we decided to include it in our line of appetizers. And besides, winter is good for three things: truffles, pomegranates, and crab. These pucks of delight consisted of fresh, local dungeness crab off the coast of the bay. Now, what makes them "from Baltimore," you ask? Well, frankly, nothing tat-tall.


Cashew crusted sea bass (hand-delivered by Vikings) with Mango salsa

As I mentioned earlier, we had some trouble deciding a theme. Going with the Island Flair idea, we first decided on a macadamia nut crusted sea bass to go with mango salsa. However, our supplier was out of macadamia nuts, so we had to go with cashews. The fish was pan-fried on a cast iron skillet and subsequently formed a golden, moist-crunchy crust. The melt in your mouth flesh of the bass went especially well with some mango salsa that the guju guru herself conjured up: a concoction of mango, shallots, olive oil, wine, and jalapenos.


Too much good stuff


Bouchon Macaroon with Ciao Bella espresso gelato

J was gracious enough to provide Macaroons from Bouchon Bakery, and we paired them with espresso gelato from Ciao Bella. And I must say, that TK makes a good macaroon. Delicately crisp on the outside and chewy on the inside that sandwiched some ephemeral creme, these macaroons were quite the treat for my palate.

Our guests agreed that this year trumped last year's dinner party. We also upgraded the music. Gone is the era of Redbook; Brazilian lounge has ushered in a new generation of dinner party music.

Better than white truffles in a wooden box

Tonight, D, J, and I put together a tasting menu after scouring the day's harvest for fresh ingredients. What resulted was not only a great meal, but a culinary revolution.


A menu that withstood the course of the night. Handwritten by yours truly. Also, notice the rustic tablecloth, burns I made with a blowtorch, and the earl grey tea stains.

The bread (unpictured): Bouchon French Bread, with extra virgin olive oil from Matzorkis Family Olive Orchards of Falasarna in Crete and balsamic vinegar, aged 500 years

Yeah, even the bread was that special


Green Globe artichokes steamed in water from le Alps


Pan seared wild sea "coquilles", with ragout of heirloom tomatoes, Aunt Louise's Latvian lentils with saffron basil "emulsion"

Yeah, just as complicated as it sounds. The sea scallops were perfectly cooked, with a carmelized exterior and a buttery, melt in your mouth interior. The lentils tasted just like how Aunt Louise used to make, which, I assure you, is no easy task indeed. Note the rustic plate to match the authenticity.

The palate cleanser:

Freshly grated orange "rinds" (on Asian plate)


Ambrosia, imported from Mt. Olympus, Greece
Harney & Sons Earl Grey with fresh Woodbury Farms grapefruit and hand grated orange "rinds"

This is truly the nectar of the gods. Clean and even bordering on healthy, who can ask for a better dessert? Oh, just you wait.


Valrhona Chocolate "Bouchon", with citron orange rind "reduction"

Rich and dark, the "bouchon," or French for cork, just oozed with "goope" when cut into. The heavenly citron, simmered for 4 hours, made for a very interesting and brilliant pairing.

The wine of the night was selected by our chief sommelier, Sir Robert Borden. A 2002 Thomas Fogarty, it was full bodied and low in acidity. An excellent choice, Mr. Borden.